Shiver me timbers! It be Talk Like a Pirate Day, and all me mortgage maties be loaded to the gunwales with grog. Aye, that Scurvey Dog, Ole’ Ben Bernake has set his cutlass to the privateer’s rate by four pieces of eight. Arr, that be good for keepin the lily-livered among us from walkin’ the plank to Davie Jones Locker.

With the sprogs and scallywags off to Fiddlers Green, me hearties be set to weigh anchor, hoist the colors, and go on the account!

While thar be some cowardly, bilge-sucking lubbers who still see me mortgage maties as shark bait, I say belay that talk! Any more, and I’ll brandish my cat o’nine tails while you kiss the gunner’s daughter.

Enjoy the day me hearties, Talk like a pirate day be great cause for levity in these troubled waters.